I like to imagine that at Link’s funeral, as the coffin is about to depart, the lid rises up and a voice says…
He was probably that kid at parties who won the final prize during Pass the Parcel, because the adults had to fix it to stop him throwing a sulk when he lost.
Does anyone really care that Hilaria Baldwin “faked” her Spanish heritage?
Andrew is a freelance sports commentator, whose day job came to a halt when the virus put paid to sporting activity. Like so many whose income hit the pause button, he turned to other activities and took solace in his two faithful companions, adapting his commentating style to report on their day to day lives.
DON’T… Be lazy, drunkenly heading for the bathroom in the middle of the night. The white telephone table in the hallway only looks like the toilet; you have several more feet to go.
I brushed up on my French and started to learn Italian and Spanish (again). The Italian has been going quite well; the Spanish less so. But given that I lived in Spain for 10 years and got no further than “taco” and “Don’t kill the f*****g bull!”, that’s hardly surprising.
When a movie has the title I’m Thinking of Ending Things, and the opening voiceover begins with a character saying precisely that, you’re kind of interested. I made it to a little over half time when, quite frankly, I was thinking of ending things.
At the end of a very difficult year, this wasn’t quite how I imagined wishing everyone a happy 2021, but in these unpredictable times we really can’t gauge anything, least of all happiness. So, I’m going to change it slightly and wish you all a Loving New Year.
The world has changed. My groping days – at least, in public places – are over; I am too old for such displays of affection, and also, today, I would probably be behind bars.
There is only ever one available, single person in the whole vicinity: a woman or man whose life is unfulfilled: generally, a widow or widower with a cute kid and, just for fun, a terminally ill relative. The kid still believes in Santa, hoping that he will bring the ultimate Christmas present – a new mom or dad.